What it feels like to be Diabetic

• Doctor appointments
• Lab tests
• Poking my finger at least 10 times a day
• People asking if poking my finger hurts
• It hurts to poke my finger, DUH, its a needle poking my finger, poke yours once
• Some days are great and some are just crap and there is no rhyme or reason to it
• Knowing that some night this disease could kill me
• Fear of dying from Diabetes and not seeing my baby grow up
• Fear of dying from Diabetes and leaving my husband alone to raise our child
• Fear of dying period
• Being bombarded by things and people who think they know how to cure type 1
• Medical bills on top of medical bills that will never stop, ever
• Arguing with pharmacies to use my test stip discount card so I can actually save some money
• Calling my insurance company all the time
• Picking up prescriptions every month
• Worry about future complications
• Fear of future complications
• Family members freaking out when you don't answer the phone
• Family members worrying about me
• Knowing my body isn't healthy and never will be
• Knowing the cure for my disease hasn't happened in over 90 years and isn't coming soon
• Doing things I know will cause my blood sugar to crash, then I have to eat SUGAR
• Eating foods I know will cause my blood sugar to spike
• Eating foods I know people will look at me all crazy like because they THINK I "cannot" eat that
• Seeing the judgement of me on people's faces
• Hearing the judgmental whispers from people
• Knowing no one else gets it unless they have it
• Feeling alone and secluded from normal people
• Feeling like an outcast
• Feeling like no one really cares you are Diabetic
• I dont want to be Diabetic anymore
• It's hard, its a never ending battle
• Diabetes wears me out
• Some days I just want to quit, throw in the damn towel and get a break
• Never getting a break from Diabetes
• I hate knowing my blood sugar is dropping and having a sleeping baby on me and not wanting to move and wake her up, but I have to or I could pass out
• Knowing my Diabetes does limit me sometimes and sometimes I miss out on things because of it and others don't understand
• I can't just jump in my car and go somewhere without planning everything out
• I can't just do anything without making sure I have enough supplies
• I hate that this disease limits me
• I hate that going for a dang walk makes my blood sugar crash
• I hate that doing anything fun or that I enjoy makes my blood sugar drop
• I am sick of low blood sugar
• I am sick of high blood sugar
• I am sick of my blood sugar being on my mind 24/7
• I am sick of trying to figure out how many carbs I am eating
• I am sick of being sick
• I am sick waiting for that ever so elusive cure
• ☑ I just want to be normal 

My life revolves around this bottle